While cleaning out a kitchen cupboard I found an unopened bag of fun size almond Hershey bars that I bought and hid before Halloween. I have to hide that stuff or else a certain someone in our house (whose first name starts with the letter “Quinn”) will make that stuff disappear so fast I’m hard pressed to remember if I even bought candy in the first place.
Finding this bag was a little disconcerting because, as I told you last week, I threw out most of my son’s Halloween candy after I bought it back from him. I figure it was cheaper than letting his blood sugar hit new heights right before his teeth rotted out of his head.
The problem with finding a brand-spanking brand new bag of Halloween candy is twofold:
- I feel wasteful throwing out a perfectly good, unopened bag of candy. It’s okay to throw out a pillowcase full of Halloween candy that my son collected, because at that point that candy is “used”. The fact that he had fun collecting means it’s already served its purpose.
- If I keep it, it will speak to me every time I pass by the kitchen (I love almond Hershey bars). Eventually I’ll have to consume the entire bag just to shut the damn thing up, and lord knows I don’t need to be eating Halloween candy. Just ask my thighs, who in recent years have reunited like long lost twins who were separated at birth. (Chubby thighs may be cute on an infant, but I’m sorry, they’re downright scary on middle-aged gams.)
Hershey Chocolate Pie Recipe to the Rescue!
Coincidentally, I had a party to go to and I was supposed to bring a dessert. I thought about just bringing the bag of almond Hershey bars and calling it good. But since this wasn’t a six-year-old’s birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese I quickly came to my senses.
Instead, I dug out an old recipe for a pie my “Mamasan” used to make for my brothers and me when we were kids. It’s super easy and has only five ingredients, one of which is almond Hershey bars. (Although, any meltable chocolate bar would probably work.)
I made the pie, using the offensive almond Hershey bars, thus getting them out of my house before they led me to my dreaded fat pants. And wouldn’t you know it? The resulting pie looked fantastic! I took it to my party, where everyone ate it, exclaiming what a brilliant chef I am. (Even though, unbeknownst to them, I could burn water.)
So just in case YOU happen to have a pile of almond Hershey bars lying around your house, and you can’t bear to banish them to the garbage can, you might want to use this recipe to get them the hell out of your house.
Mom’s Hershey Pie
- 1 graham cracker crust
- 16 large marshmellows
- 1 lb. fun size almond Hershey bars
- 1/2 cup of milk
- 1/2 pint heavy cream, whipped
Melt marshmellows, Hershey bars, and milk in double-boiler. Let cool completely. Fold in whipped cream and pour into pie crust. Chill in fridge overnight.
I promise, this is a real winner. You can thank me later.
P.S. I did a search for other easy Hershey recipes and found this delectable Hershey Kitchens website. Who knows? With the holidays coming I might actually get inspired to make something else equally as yummy…as long as it doesn’t have more than five ingredients. I DO have my limits, you know.
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Stacy Dymalski is an award winning keynote speaker and stand-up comic who gave up the glamorous life of coach travel, smokey comedy clubs, and heckling drunks for the glamourous life of raising kids (who happen to be bigger hecklers than the drunks). This blog is her new stage.
For more of Stacy’s comedy check out her hilarious book Confessions of a Band Geek Mom available in paperback and on Kindle on Amazon.com.