In my never-ending quest to avoid getting a real job, I have embarked upon yet another business venture that is fueled by my agile wit and pointed sense of humor. (Both of which have been discernible deterrents when it comes to relationships, especially those involving bosses that don’t appreciate a subordinate who graciously points out the absurd without being asked. I know, what dour ingrates, right?)

If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you know I occasionally post funny, little quips, some of which get passed around cyberspace like a bad case of the chicken pox. At one point I contemplated rounding up all my favorite wisecracks and publishing them in a coffee table book for the subliminally inane, but then decided against it when I realized the demographic for such a book were those hip, arty, “sassypants” types that don’t have any disposable income because there simply aren’t enough museum curator or Stephen-Colbert-joke-writer jobs to go around.

Hence my demographic couldn’t afford such a book.

But they could afford a card. A greeting card, that is.

I’m Sure This is How Hallmark Got Started

Enter Amy Chin. My dear, long-time, graphic designer friend who (coincidentally) just happened to be starting a business called Sassypants Design, in which she puts her artistic spin on greeting cards. Except when you opened one of her cards there was no greeting inside. Although her cards are hip enough to sell themselves I just couldn’t help but mentally add my own sassypants captions whenever I looked at her cards. So of course, I just had to offer up some of my own funny verbiage to go with a couple of cards she’d already created. Not only was she NOT offended by my chutzpah, she asked if I had any more wiseacre remarks she could use as captions.

Any more?? Are you kidding me?

I immediately sent her pages of some of my favorite tweets and Facebook posts that I had written, many of which she has since created cards for. And as a result Amy’s lovely ladies impart sassypants wisdom such as this:

Or this:

And since we’re both dog lovers, she came up with a few charming pooches and I gave them each a voice that goes something like this:

And this:

Sassypants Design Comes Alive! I Mean Goes Live…On the Web

We’ve combined Amy’s artistic talent with my smart-alec-y sensibility to create cards that are sure to change the world. Or at least brighten your day. We have almost 30 retro lady cards and about 12 dog cards, and we’re constantly coming up with new designs. Our cards are printed on extremely high-quality, eco-friendly, the superest of super card stock, and you can find them in select retail shops in San Diego and Park City. We realize, however, that not everybody can shop in San Diego and Park City, so if the truth be told, most of our sales come from our very own Sassypants Design website—which you have to check out, by the way, even if you don’t buy anything. We had a grand, old time coming up with the images and writing the content. In fact, we went a little crazy in that if you sign up for our e-mail list we’ll send you a 20%-off-your-first-order coupon. Honestly, it’s one of those websites that’s just fun to visit no matter what the reason, if I do say so myself. The star of the website is definitely our line of cards. So feel free to peruse them and let us know what you think.

And because our silliness is infectious, we coerced our good friend, and talented photographer, Doug Hoffman into shooting some stills and an off-the-cuff promo video. We just happened to be in Powerhouse Park in Del Mar, CA, (home to Sassypants Design) with a boatload of camera equipment one evening when I was out there recently. And we just happened to be dressed nicely. And in make-up. When the lighting was perfect…. Okay, fine. We staged the whole thing. But what’s a new greeting card company without its own YouTube channel, right?

Anyway, check out our cards. We think you’ll love giving them to your friends and family as much as we loved making them for you. It’s definitely a project born out of creativity, true friendship, and the desire to avoid becoming a responsible adult.

At last I found a way for my lazy one-liners to get out there and earn their keep. I can hardly wait to see what they do for me next.

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Stacy Dymalski is an award winning keynote speaker and stand-up comic who gave up the glamorous life of coach travel, smokey comedy clubs, and heckling drunks for the glamourous life of raising kids (who happen to be bigger hecklers than the drunks). This blog is her new stage. For more of Stacy’s comedy check out her book Confessions of a Band Geek Mom available in bookstores and on Amazon in paperback and Kindle.